I have nothing written for today, and usually I have at least one piece of writing from my journal stashed away so that I always have something to post — but today I’m empty. My thoughts are slightly empty as well. Life has been so… very slow compared to how I typically live.
I’m not really sure what I’m doing right now, nor where my head is really at. I meant it when I said I feel mindlessly empty, but not in a bad way. I just have no thoughts that are consuming me at the moment, and I think that’s a good thing.
I will say, the other day someone told me a secret, and for once in my life I didn’t share said secret with anyone — which is so freaking odd for me. I never thought the day would come where I learned how to shut my mouth, but finally we are here.
I’ve learned that sometimes I really can keep my opinion to myself. I always wondered how people were able to do this, because I have a problem called word vomit, where I always say exactly what I’m thinking, and it’s gotten me into plenty of trouble — just like my mother always said it would.
With that said, my life lately has consisted of stretching, washing my face twice a day, doing my nails, knitting and crocheting multiple projects, and rotating between reading three books at one time. I want to take care of myself this year and actually live a slow life for once — no fun, exciting, and draining weekends, running on no sleep and hoping fumes carry me through the week.
I want to breathe this year, so I’m in bed by 9 p.m. reading my book, excited to do the same “boring” things the next day.
Now, do I think I have become boring? Slightly. Am I a little sad about that? Kinda — but not enough. It truly is time for me to put all my energy into being calm and keeping to myself.