Category: My Self-Awareness

  • My Back Hurts and I’m Not Even 30

    It’s come… it’s finally come—the time that I can no longer drink coffee past noon or I will inevitably stay up all night, tossing and turning in bed, wondering why I can’t fall asleep. When did I get this old? My body aging feels cruel. Everything hurts all the time. I remember a friend from Read more

  • Beautiful & Unbearable

    I don’t know how to describe the feeling of crossing the state line back into Maine after being gone for three weeks. It was like my stomach dropped into a pit, and every part of me was begging to turn around. I find it so irritating how strongly I dislike this state. I hate this Read more

  • i missed throwing up

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    I threw up today—not because I’m sick, or for any other reason than the fact that I forced myself to. I binged two packs of sushi, chicken tenders, sticky rice, and an avocado… oh, and a slice of cheesecake for dessert. All washed down with a crisp Diet Coke. I walked to the bathroom and Read more

  • Shame, Sleep, & a Side of Hummus

    Surprisingly, I’m doing well under the circumstances I’ve been put under. I really thought that after the affair situation came out, I would be spiraling—but I’m actually doing extremely well. And before anyone asks… yes, I was the other woman, and yes yes, shame on me. But also, shame on the man. That’s beside the point. Let’s Read more

  • The Power of Redefining Greatness

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    When I was applying for college during my undergrad, there was a section of the application that asked for a personal statement/essay. The other day, I stumbled upon the file that I had hidden for years and read it for the first time in seven years. I wrote about how my biggest fear was time—the Read more

  • A 24-Hour Victory

    I didn’t think about my mom yesterday. Today, as I was reading a book in my office, that thought crossed my mind. I hadn’t thought about my mom for a whole twenty-four hours. I never imagined a day would come when I wouldn’t think about her. The book I’m reading is called Forgiving What You Can’t Read more