Category: My Fears
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Holding His Thumb
I woke up holding his thumb. My back was turned to him, and that tiny grip was the only point of contact between us. God, I used to think there was no one on this Earth that I could ever comfortably sleep next to unless we slept on opposing sides of the bed, but here Read more
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The View That Held Me Still
Today I sat looking at a beautiful view. The bench was above a garden full of wildflowers, and off in the distance you could see the ocean, and even further you could see a hill with a farmhouse on the top. The view was almost perfect…just missing my dog running around with a couple of Read more
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Not Great at Running (But Great at Running Away)
I’m not sure what to write about today, but I’m sure my train of thought will take over soon. I’m five weeks into my half marathon training, and honestly, I don’t know who I thought I was when I signed up for this race. This shit is hard…harder than I expected. I’ve run one before, Read more
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Just Want to Be a Good Friend
Sometimes I forget how good my friends are—especially the ones that just let me be me. Free of judgment, and instead of trying to change me, they take the time to understand the way I am. I feel like I always take them for granted until my life goes to shit. Lately I’ve been leaning Read more
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The Stillness Is Screaming
I’ve been inconsistent. Ever since I got home from my three-week road trip, not a single part of me has wanted to leave my bed. Don’t get me wrong—I’ve definitely left my bed—but I feel like my body could sleep forever. I did so much socializing and driving in those three weeks that the need Read more
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Miss Heartless
“Yuka, not everyone can be as heartless as you.”So I’m heartless — but you didn’t watch me burst into tears five times today. I hold a lot of guilt…guilt for running away, 20 hours away from home, and leaving my dad behind. I come home for the first time in about a year, and it Read more